 "I Am Stronger Than I Thought"
After spending two years in the Family Care Program at Texas Baptist Children’s Home, 42-year-old Elaine Rashid found the confidence to embrace her own happiness. But it took a few significant life changes and some self-examination before she learned the lessons to be taught by adversity. When Elaine’s marriage of 17 years began to crumble, she realized she could no longer subject her four children to the anguish she bore. After years of controlling and emotionally taxing behavior on the part of her husband, Elaine took the first steps to securing her family’s well-being. “I had to leave,” she said. “I thought long and hard about going back, but I knew I wasn’t doing my family any favors by being unhappy in my marriage.” Living on her own, the Jamaican native realized quickly the journey would be challenging. Her shift began at 5 p.m. on Friday and didn’t end until 5 p.m. on Sunday, plus she usually pulled additional shifts during the week. That schedule, coupled with the pace of keeping up with her children, soon became taxing. “I decided I needed help,” Elaine admitted. “I wanted to go back to school and knew I couldn’t do that and keep working the way I was. It would be too much.” Although the split from her husband was amicable, when Elaine decided to pursue her education, his assistance stopped. “I was looking forward to him helping with the children, but it didn’t work,” she said. Elaine entered Family Care with well-thoughtout goals. She knew she wanted to go to school, that she wanted her children in a stable environment and that she wanted to become more independent. She took away so much more. “It has been a unique experience,” Elaine said. “I learned how to stick to a strict schedule and how to become organized. It also taught me a lot of patience because you are living in a house with other families. Overall, it has been a very good experience for me.” “The goal of Family Care is to teach ladies in the program how to manage their own lives,” said Melanie Martinez, Family Care Program Supervisor. “The staff is here to provide guidance, counsel and re-direction when necessary. Our goal is to send these ladies back into the world with the skills for them to be fully independent.” Independence was something Elaine craved. She yearned to have the opportunity to make her own choices. Her first step was to enroll in Austin Community College. “That’s when she really started to gain confidence in herself,” said Brenda Brakeman, Elaine’s Family Care Case Manager. “She’s done really well in school, and that has helped boost her self-esteem quite a bit.” Working toward her Licensed Vocational Nurse degree, she is on target to graduate in December. But Elaine’s ambition doesn’t stop there. She plans to pursue her Registered Nurse degree next. “It’s never too late to make improvements in your life,” she said. “No matter what adversities come your way, it’s okay. That’s life. Sometimes you just have to ask yourself if you are going to stay on the ground or are you going to get back up and try again.” In April, Elaine and her four children – now ages 15, 9, 5 and 2 – move from Family Care into the Independent Living Program on campus. In August, the family plans to move into an off-campus apartment, the first true step to starting their lives anew. It will be the culmination of a lot of hard work and self improvement. And there is one thing Elaine learned that she could have never discovered in all her text books, and it is about herself.
“I’m a lot stronger than I thought I was,” she said. “I realized that, if you don’t have to go through adversity, then you don’t have a chance to stretch yourself. I know now that I am absolutely capable of doing whatever I want to do.”
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